5. ANALYSIS OF PARTICULAR TESTIMONIES (MAIN THEMES)

5.1 PRELIMINARY REMARKS

-The chapter is constructed in a way that will allow specific problem areas to be individually analyzed, and to work out connecting threads not at first visible to the naked eye.

-No definitive all-embracing analysis was prepared, rather, a systematic approach to questions and problems which had prominence in the statements made during the interviews. There are also a number of other subjects which have been left out to achieve a streamlined presentation.

5.2.1. ABILITY TO MAKE CRITICAL EVALUATIONS

The people in this group were not prepared to submit to the leadership role of T.M. teachers and governors, and thereby caused trouble:

"I did not submit to the will of those other people, and in doing so I aggravated them." (2)

Time and time again the critical disposition of the group became evident. One young man in his answer best represents the other:

In the grouping together of these people we took their general social situation/status as a basis. Most were, as students people who had a steady job, quite secure as regards their portion in society, and had taken up the meditation only as a relaxation technique. This is also shown by the often heard remark, that they believed you could also relax using other methods:

"I was often pretty tense after my working day and hoped that the meditation would relax me and my evening would be better used because of that." (2)

"I saw the meditation as a way to relax; I wasn't aware of any other possibilities." (2)

One woman stated her main motive in taking up the meditation was not for the meditation itself, but to keep her husband, who was involved full time with the organization.

"I wanted to keep my marriage, because of that I spent time and money. I thought it was a phase my husband was going through that would pass. At first I tried to manage the situation in a normal way, but there was no point. I then decided, well, I'll do the meditation as well..." (2)

The marriage ended in divorce.

Another characteristic of this group is the relatively short period of involvement with T.M. The longest anyone in this group spent at T.M. was three years. In the other groups there were also some who exhibited the same characteristics. However their appearance resulted in more stability for the people quoted in this section.

Two people took up the meditation as its being a part of a religious cult. Those religiously motivated people were consequently able to concentrate on the religiosity of T.M.:

"In those times it was a religious thing for those who were seeking it, otherwise those courses wouldn't have been running." (What is meant are lectures on the Bhagavad Gita.) The person continues "I had no interest in lying to everyone that it was a relaxation technique, because I knew that it was something else." (2)

The fundamental criteria of this group can be summed up in two words: "getting out" and "crossing over".

Since they had little involvement or commitment to the organization from the beginning, the ex-meditators generally left the organization before they stopped the practice of T.M.

"I had noticed during discussions at the table that you could get through to nobody, everyone lived in his isolated little box and no one was interested in me as a person". (10) They carried on meditating for a while at home after they had totally distanced themselves from the organization. With the loss of company (of other meditators), the meditation also lost its meaning and they began to view it much more critically. They were able to stop the practice without any great difficulty and take up other interests.

In cases where experiences of a positive nature were associated with T.M. often the process of stopping the meditation practice became considerably more difficult. According to testimonies made, withdrawal symptoms were experienced.

"As soon as I stopped the T.M. meditation I knew that I was dependent on it. Things were bad. My wife needed only to aggravate me a little, and I was flat out on the floor. I was more sensitive and excitable and I slept a lot." (2)

Many gave up the secrecy of the mantra after they stopped meditating, which in some cases demanded a lot of self- control.

"After I gave up, I had to say my mantra. But I couldn't do it, I found it very difficult." (2)

"Up until now I've treated my mantra as if it were a holy object in a curious way it still has a lot of significance for me. It's very personal, like a piece of me." (2)

"I once tried to make contact with some of the meditators, to try and get to know them, but I quickly found out that they weren't interested. I made the observation as I got more involved in the organization that those who had been meditating for a long time had almost no social contact with others anymore: in other words, the more you get submerged in the movement, the more you shut yourself off from the outside world.

"Unlike before, I lived really isolated and old contacts with people just completely changed in character. I just wasn't interested in those things anymore. You kept on getting preached to about self-realization and cosmic consciousness." (2)

"During that time I had a lot of contact with meditators (governors and T.M. teachers) they have absolutely no relationships with other people, I have to say it. They never go out anywhere where there is poverty and suffering, since the stress (negative karma) could go into them and they don't want that...when young people go out into the world and learn the harshness of the world, the hard facts of life, they have a natural defense against it overcoming them, but those, they stand there, their defense system is totally dismantled and they're completely helpless. They are not in a position (as meditators) to go their own way in the world. They can live only inside the T.M. circle. They need the protection of the crowd. I noticed that too in my own case, how quickly you get used to certain surroundings. Because I'm a realist, I was able to get myself out of it again.

"I also found, that governors evade the issue if a conflict of any type threatens to develop. They actually stand behind another (neutral) person who has both feet firmly in the ground. Governors aren't able to get along at all." (2)

"I noticed with my initiator that people as soon as they become initiators, only think according to Maharishi. Those people function in an already existing framework. Absolute dependency on the master , the T.M. teacher and in all their thinking... I once asked him a question, but he couldn't even understand it, it was all beyond his horizon of thought. He was so saturated with Maharishi that he himself faded more and more into the background and I didn't want that to happen to me. I didn't want to be one of Maharishi's marionettes...I left the movement..." (2)

Some of the people who were critical of the general grouping of meditators had in a passing way a personal satisfaction with the practice of meditation, which in part had to do with experiences they had during the meditation.

"Our sense of partnership grew; there was more unity in the family. We all meditated, our children as well, and that was part of the daily routine for us, like eating and drinking." (2)

"I still meditate, but I'm very distrustful of the organization. I only regard the method as being a good thing. I took part in seminars for two years, took one course, and now have distanced myself from the organization." (2)

"I had a really long day during my T.M. phase, because I needed less sleep. I could even do my homework in the evenings...I was always well rested. For a time I needed only three or fours hours sleep." (2)

These people remained able to argue and disagree during the T.M. phase. This ability was necessary in the light of the aforementioned distance from and rejection of the organization.

5.3.1. PRELIMINARY REMARK ON THE CONCEPT "VIEW OF REALITY"

"I believe that T.M. is religious, because you get to think things that you otherwise wouldn't have. But not with regard to a real world descendency from a high god down to lower things, rather it involves a unity... the being of the world. I didn't have such concepts before." (2)

On the other hand there are hidden in their experiences and world view a set of psychologically definable perceptions. "For example, he (Maharishi) once said "From the 1st of May there will no more suffering. Then I got really excited and said "My mother hasn't been too well lately. I'm glad now that there'll be no more suffering (for her) after the 1st of May. But when you go up to the people after that date and challenge them about it, they are able to talk their way out of it really well." (2)

The justifications that people give in their testimonies should be treated as having been reflected on by the people themselves and are psychologically interpretable perceptions.

"Every time I had difficulties the doctor told me that I was unstressing, that it was a completely normal reaction. I was getting rid of years of accumulated stress. I told him that I was extremely ill and that, in my opinion, my blood circulation wasn't in order. But he denied that... I should meditate more." (2)

Whoever walks the road of "unstressing" should personally avoid all possible outside causes of stress, since the atmosphere (around him) could lead to a negative accumulation and consequently a hindering of his own development.

"It once happened to me that I had backpains due to tension. I wanted someone to massage my back, but no one would do it, since, they said, that that is stress and unstressing, and if we do that with our hands then it will go into our bodies." (2)

The personal unstressing on the part of the meditator has as a consequence a reduction in contact with people and a reduction in relationships.

We can deduce here that the western concept of "stress" (the curing of which constitutes a large part of the promises made in T.M. advertising), has its cause in "karma" this "relationship" between the two is only known to insiders.

"The Indian teaching on karma definitely influenced me. Whatever I do has a consequence...Maharishi was in Hamburg, there was a big deal and a lot of initiators were there, because your karma would get better because of it." (2)

This change took place first in the thinking and perception of the person, induced by the meditation.

"A hell of a lot of thoughts come and you don't pay any attention to them anymore. Practically speaking, I wasn't master of my own thoughts; you go around in an unnatural way with thoughts spinning around in your head." (2)

The procession of thoughts was described by an ex- meditator in the following way:

"I experienced my nervous system...I experienced how impressions differ...how it went into me...My awareness wasn't only directed outward, but also inwards. I naturally had to be damn careful about all those desirable things around me. If you see everything with more awareness, than you get careful what flows into you. You get more sensitive, more selective. I saw myself as a film projector in which there as a film. And we could look at it-like this, that the black part was the unconscious mind, and the place where the pictures showed up, that was the conscious mind, and during the meditation the black part departed from the other part of the film.

"T.M. was for me a means to see for the first time that such desires have an effect on us. I'd thought it over beforehand, how I would explain it to you. My psyche is a desert, a large expanse of sand, and now there's rain falling, that is desires. I build a house with a roof on this sand, that means, that I shield myself off from the desires. I make somewhere a small hole and let only one or two drops of rain in". (2)

In the above it is clear what happens to a person because of the mantra. As a result of the stopping of desires there is a complete turn of the attention onto the mantra, what T.M. calls non-concentration. As a result: "a greater overview and improved capacity to turn the attention towards specific aims". (Realization of an ideal society, a scientifically based program, MERU press, 1976, page 24)

We shall see in section 5.6 that following this "desire- stop" is the meditation, the causes of an over- susceptibility with serious health risks can be established.

Besides this mainly psychological change is the perception, many meditators also underwent (some unconsciously) a change in their world view. They expected as a result of the mantra's influence a positive effect on the world as a result of their own good karma. Direct contacts were perceived by people with this particular viewpoint.

"She said to me...well, I hope you've noticed the harmonious vibrations coming from me...everything was so harmonious...it had nothing to do with harmony, but she couldn't see that. If anything nice happened, then she attributed that immediately to her vibrations". (1)

Likewise, meditators saw their good vibrations working directly on objects.

"When I had a green light three times in a row, then it was the meditation and not the traffic lights." (2)

Meditators felt themselves bound to the world in a new way, i.e. mental, through their meditations.

They could give up all activities, only the participation in the bettering of the world's karma was their task. This should be made clear in the following examples.

"When the politics of the country underwent a change, he said that that happened through unstressing, and Maharishi... there didn't have to be suffering in the world. The whole world could be changed with meditation." (1)

"He was interested in nothing anymore. Maharishi would love to take over the governing of the world, and then there would be no more war or starvation anymore." (1)

"He even maintained that my cousins' varicose veins would disappear if he did T.M." (1)

"Even when something happened behind the iron curtain, then it was because of T.M. peoples influence...she once said that race discrimination in the U.S.A. would go if they all did T.M."(l)

"The state could pay for us. He would do so much for mankind with his meditation, that the state should take care of us." (3)

To complete these examples we now give another piece from a T.M. circular:

On 20th December, Guru Dev's birthday, we achieved the long sought after one percent mark with 38 sidhas, which gives actually an effect of 1.6%. On the next day all sidhas who were not needed drove to Burg on Eehmern for the world peace assembly.

On our return we learned of something that gave us great joy: the rate of crime in the city, which had been rising year after year, sank according to the newspaper reports by 9.9% in 1979 as against the previous year's figures.

And some particular types of crime had reached their lowest level since 1970, according to press reports. Neumurster, up until now the place with the highest rate of criminal acts committed in Schleswig-Holstein, gave up its unenviable first place position this year." (Center of the Age of Enlightenment, Neununster: a circular of 3rd Sept.. 1980)

"How right we were in our prognosis was shown by one weekend in July: on the 19/20 day of July we had to do without our 1% effect because of people going away on holidays, and only did the program with between 19 and 25 sidhas. The local press had headlines of "a rash of break- ins throughout the entire city", that criminals and car stealers were "unusually active during the weekend" and kept the police on their toes. Of course, we did something very positive this weekend and are happy with this first real test (albeit involuntary) ." (center of the age of enlightenment, Neununster: a circular of 3rd Sept. 1980)

"What he said up there (on the video) was totally accepted as the truth. It was like this: he spoke the truth and nothing but the truth." (2)

"Maharishi was a sort of prophet to me." (2)

"Like Jesus, Maharishi is a completely self-realized man." (l)

Another special facet is also closely linked with Maharishi's authority, which can be seen from the examples shown above.

Negative karma, the negative vibrations of the world of non-meditators causes a growing unwillingness to have contacts with the outside world, depending on how much importance the meditator ascribes to his personal "unstressing", in other words, a freedom from negative or bad vibrations. The Maharishi effect provides an ideal justification for a withdrawal from society, since many see such a move as being best for their own unstressing, and the unstressing of the world. Everyday social intercourse is substituted with a meditative creation of a positive atmosphere; i.e. a positive karma.

Therefore, for many meditators there was just the one aim: to dismantle or reduce the importance of outer reality, in order to be able to turn one's attention completely to an inner reality.

"I differentiate between the reality that has an effect on me and the reality that works inside me. I try to dismantle the reality that has an effect on me as much as I can..." (2)

Fear or anxiety about stress governs physical activity as well. Physical activity is reduced in favor of meditative calm. All exercises, like for example "asanas", serve only as a physical relaxation for further meditation.

"It's always said - rest and activity, the principal maintained by T.M. But as far as I'm concerned you don't have activity...those exercises are just pseudo-activity.' (2)

5.4.1 SOCIAL BEHAVIOR AMONG MEDITATORS

"The more you got involved in it, the more exclusive the company becomes and everything revolves around Maharishi. Then you get an advanced mantra from Maharishi. He keeps this a secret to himself and you are all the more dependent on him because of that." (2)

This is the way an ex-T.M. teacher sees it. In the surrounding area of Maharishi's influence, allocation of position depends on the height of consciousness. This is arrived at by increasingly advanced techniques, (T.M. teachers, sidhas) and through longer meditations, and is extremely expensive for all those aspiring to such positions. This money spent in doing so serves as far as the meditator is concerned, not only in his own development, but also the betterment of his surroundings and even society. Therefore social relations, involvement in a physical way for the betterment of others and society becomes superfluous, since the meditation on its own will automatically achieve the desired end.

Apart from the pressures on meditators to become more deeply involved, they succumbed to the strong pressures on them both from without and within themselves to conform. This conformity was the guarantee for promotion, a rising up the ladder.

"As I went, they started talking about style of hair and appearance. It was suddenly the way that T.M. people should wear their hair short, and I said that no way would I consider that. People when I myself got involved in T.M. started to change their appearance and overtook me in an institutional sense, because they were obedient...I noticed how people let themselves be molded...This increasing regimentation aggrevated[sic] me..." (2)

"After the course was half-over, people liked to swap their experiences; and got a thrill out of doing it - it was like a qualification, to have such experiences." (2]

The readiness to accept external pressures to submit is promoted very forcefully through an intentional structuring of the groups by T.M. initiators. (see 4.1.5)

The Meditator's behavior was judged by those questioned to be a behavior in isolation. This lonesomeness was particularly marked during participation in courses.

"I once tried to make contact with some of the meditator's, but quickly found out that they weren't interested." (2)

As against that others reported that they started up friendships with other meditators.

"I only started friendships with other meditator's during the T.M. phase. (2)

"(He) only had contacts with meditators, and looked for others (non-meditators) so that he could get them to do T.M." (1)

The relationships towards people of the same mind took a different shape, because they saw themselves as elitist and were already part of the movement. There is to be seen a "reduction of social relationships down to the elitist circle of meditators" (24). Whoever stands on the edge, neither 'on the inside' or 'the outside', and has an undecided attitude, experiences an isolation as part of the crisis of 'crossing over'. This crisis is either evaded or negated as being non-existant[sic]. The readiness of people interested in advancing to comply is combined with a strict limitation of the self in terms of outside forces, so that an "in between" position is not tolerated by the movement. The attraction of advancement lead many to comply and conform, as well as to shut themselves off from outside influences.

"There weren't actual difficulties, but I distanced myself from certain people because they were very touchy, and I wanted to avoid that negativity, so that I wouldn't be dragged down to that level. Whenever I felt negative vibrations in certain people, I avoided those people and broke off contact with them." (2)

"The main reason I left home was that in doing so I could meditate in peace. Back there that was the most important thing for me......to advance further.......I'd had a lot of friends before (the meditation). When I moved out from home, they came to visit me, but I never opened the door. I wanted my peace and quiet. I was most often alone and had uncontrollable compulsive thoughts. I got depressed very much after and just wanted to die......' (2)

"When I was still meditating and was involved in conversations with people, who were of a different opinion about things than I, I always said to myself: let them talk, they aren't as advanced as I am; I never tried to really listen to them." (2)

"There was a consequence for the family life as a result of my meditating. I kept on withdrawing more and more and just wasn't interested in communication anymore. A certain arrogance had crept into my thinking and I thought that my parents were somehow of little value since they weren't experiencing what I was and were leading a stressful life. From then on I looked down my nose at them ...and I noticed, as I got more involved in the movement, that those who had been meditating for a longtime had almost no social contact with others anymore; in other words, the more you got submerged in the movement, the more you shut yourself off from the outside world." (2)

"The friendships I had didn't do anything for me anymore. I thought that other people lived as though in a dark room and weren't aware of what was really going on. You do it unconsciously, keeping away from them, because you see things so differently...I saw in my relationship to others a certain danger for my own development. ["]

A shifting around in the area of relationships because of changing interests is an everyday experience in the world. Here, however, as regards the breaking off of contacts by meditators, the scales are heavily weighed against non- meditators. The following testimonies will serve to illustrate that this is a trend in the T.M. movement. The world of non-meditators is a world of negative karma and radiates this bad karma out on meditators who come in contact with it. Here we give again a quote from section 5.3.3:

"Deeper understanding was our vocabulary for perception. Although today I hold power over others to be a negative thing, in those days I considered it to be positive; power in the sense that a particular force of radiance is created by T.M. which influences other peep.....with us it was like this, whoever is in the highest state of consciousness has the right to exercises power over other people who have a lesser awareness. That is, in an Indian context, caste-awareness.....it's a matter of consciousness and reincarnation." (2)

Similar utterances confirm that this is a common thought in T.M.:

"Let them go to hell those who don't want to meditate. What does it matter if they have miserable lives...I noticed how people became much paler, slower in their movements, much more introverted and paler - many of them staggered around. In response to all of those phenomena, you are told that it is proper and normal, it is unstressing. Spiritual encumbrances were coming to the surface and they were causing the suffering...meditators are glad when something like that happens, because, they say, then it's gone out of the system. I doubt that. When I said that those experiences hadn't gone, the T.M. teacher said: well, you're not enlightened yet". (2)

"And when he became ill, Mr. X said to him that that wouldn't have happened, if all of us were meditators...there were always confrontations because we weren't meditators." (1)

"Maharishi said that the other partner would also have to meditate, so that the marriage wouldn't break up...It is said that you get more healthy and calm and you can work better. But that didn't happen to my husband, in fact, the opposite: I find that others around (him) are just extra weight. He once said to me that one could advance so far that one wouldn't feel anything anymore, not for other people either that you only live for yourself and don't feel for other people, or care about what's happening around you." (3)

These examples show the way in which the view of reality fostered by T.M. affords the opportunity to lay the fault of broken relationships with non-meditators. (It is far more probable that the cause lies in the destabilizing effects of the meditation. Section 5.6. deals with this).

The "world of T.M." becomes a concrete subject for discussion, and all other themes are relegated to the sidelines.

"We were actually on good speaking terms, but in his case he was actually only able to talk about T.M." (1)

"He was possessed by T.M. and addressed everyone; for example if someone was with him in a bar, he immediately started talking to him and everyone around the table about it." (1)

The mandatory involvement in the T.M. movement causes a strong "insider mentality". People who go it alone live in isolation, without communication from the movement. The initial companionship during courses ends up in people becoming effectively isolated from others of similar disposition.

"The people in the center exhibited a very strange behavior. When someone asked them a question to which they couldn't give a direct answer, they gave a self-satisfied laugh and wandered off, almost as if to say - our world is in order. We don't lead a stressful life, we don't have problems. They consider themselves to be elite." (2)

Because the aim is to become enlightened and together with that a freedom from stress and problems, particular questions arise with regard to the movement's portrayal of itself. We have examined the social aspect. There is an effective contradiction between the claims for a perfect world and everyday social intercourse. The origin of this incompatibility is, according to the statements of meditators, to be found in the negative karma of the world of non-meditators. The representatives of this much sought after world are however (almost